Big occasions, no matter how big or small they are, have one thing in common; they creep up on us as stressful and daunting days when, in fact, their stress factors are completely up to us. Maybe it’s the film industry and all their hilarious scenes of mad brides on the brink of explosion, or perhaps it’s just the media, in general, and all the hype around weddings and holidays.
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It doesn’t matter whose fault it is, really, as we can easily turn it around and put an end to the old mantra of how much work it is, and how we’d just like to crawl away instead and forget all about it.
Treat yourself and your partner to some mental health care this week, and be on the frontline of combating stress in your new household. It will give your marriage a reliable and caring start, after all, and you can look at those Hollywood movies, shake your head, and say ‘that’s not how it is.’
The pressure of perfection
Everything is supposed to be perfect on your big day. From finding the perfect wedding ring, wedding dress, cake, flowers, location, guest list – but no, it really isn’t supposed to be perfect. It should be fun, exciting, and more than anything, it should be the best party you’ve ever been to.
When you talk about the process of wedding planning with your friends, don’t be afraid to admit that you’re sometimes struggling. Besides from being a great way to unburden yourself a bit, it’s also healthy for your friends who may be brides or grooms in the future – with you in the lead, they know everything doesn’t have to be picture perfect.
Far from it, in fact, so buy diamond jewelry online rather than walking through a dozen shops, and make a game out sending those wedding invitations.
Keep calm and marry on
A lot of couples therapists can testify to the anxiety of newlyweds or those who are about to get married in a few short weeks. It’s supposed to be the happiest time of your life, so why do you feel so blue?
The hype around the honeymoon-phase and newlyweds being over the moon with joy can easily make any bride or groom feel like something is wrong with them – and the guilt starts to build up.
It’s almost as if it’s our fault when we’re not as happy as society, whoever they are, says we should be. If you’re feeling a panic attack on the rise before your wedding or notice signs of it in your partner, reach out, talk about it, and go for a good run together once in a while. Exercise really does make it easier to cope with anxiety and stress.
The feeling of having everyone’s eyes on you during your big day and the expectations of being endlessly happy can be a lot to bear for many – and you don’t want your prospective wife or husband to feel alone in all of this.
At the end of the day, it’s the wedding itself you’ll want to remember and treasure – not how much you panicked before saying your I dos.